Stay at home mom to Single mom. What advice can you give to help make the transition a smooth one?

I'd like to know what I should expect, what surprised you, what were you not prepared to handle, etc. if you have divorced and had to make it on your own again after being a stay at home mom, to becoming a single mother who now has to leave her kids and go to work. My kids are 2 yrs, and I have a baby girl due on Aug 6th. I have work experience, was in the military but haven't had a job in a few years, and really don't know what I should expect, what will I encounter while trying to make it on my own?





I should add, we are stationed overseas, and I will be going back to the states, he will be staying overseas for another year. So I will be completely alone for a while, and the kids will not have their father around for a while.





Only helpful advice please, no nasty/rude comments or even the suggestion of counseling, because we tried, I usually went alone, and one person can't make a relationship work if the other is only humoring them with the advice the counselor givesStay at home mom to Single mom. What advice can you give to help make the transition a smooth one?
Well first off... when u get back to the states research all the local daycares! You want one that you feel comfortable with also, you better think in advance about the baby one the way and find out about daycare or a babysitter for the baby too. Then look for a job. The first few weeks will be rough on you and the 2 year old but it will just take getting use to. Hopefully, when you move home you are moving close to family. You will need all the help you can get being a single mom of a 2 year old and newborn. When all else fails, keep faith in yourself. And just tell yourself that you have 2 babies to take care of and their future depends on you! You will be ok! Take care of those babies they are most important! Good LuckStay at home mom to Single mom. What advice can you give to help make the transition a smooth one?
Dear S-a-h-m to S-m:


For some reason I found myself looking at this website and saw your message. My heart goes out to you. I'm not by any means in the same situation you are since I'm now a grandmom but perhaps you'll consider my suggestion among the many others you're likely to receive.


I was in a similar situation at one time, had young children and then a husband who became seriously ill requiring me to stay home. Fortunately I had good office skills and was able to type from a dictaphone, or from rough drafts, etc.


I also cared for other children in my home while their mothers worked outside the home.


Perhaps you can let these skills and the wish to work at home be known among your friends, at church, or by advertising in the newspaper or other places.


A way that I believe has worked for others is to share half-day work with others in similar positions as yours.


I wish you good luck and will pray for you in your transition.





Myra
I would expect trial and error finding a good daycare provider for your little ones. Also, it is difficlut to make it on one low wage job, so I hope you will be getting spousal support or child support. Also be sure to add in the cost of daycare in your support order.





Good luck to you.
Do you know where you are moving? If so, google local daycare centers, maybe a moms group, and get some recommendations. I have been a single mom since my son's dad died while I was pregnant with him, and sweetie, it's hard but not as hard as being in a relationship that isn't working. My perspective totally changed as to what I am looking for in a partner after I had my son, he is four now. You will totally be fine! You will encounter some very rough and challenging days, and some awesome ones, some bittersweet, and some sad. If you are sad after your baby girl is born, make sure you talk to someone. And good luck!!
its too bad things aren't able to be worked out; but generaly from a single mom; it's difficult; very difficult; the best thing you can do is set up a resource net like i have; i have my mother for emergency babysitting and i've investigated several day cares to pick the ';best one';; good luck to you in your new life; remember that your friends and family will be your sanity saver during the transition; and it's best if you can stay in ';upbeat spirits'; during your move for your 2 year olds sake; as they will pick up on any stress and tension; if you make things sound light with them; generally they'll lighten up on you.